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Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Oh it is ON BITCH

Perhaps this began as a mere point-counterpoint between a camp defending Tim Tebow and a camp defending Dennis Dixon, but now it is ON.

Let's dissect the defintion from the Heisman site:

"At the insistence of the DAC officers he organized and set into motion the structure and voting system to determine the best collegiate football player in the country"

At no point in said description does it ever use the word individual. Inherent in the emboldened phrase above is the idea that the best player must also be the best teammate. He must be upheld to the highest standards of athleticism, teamwork, professionalism, and winning. Tim Tebow may be the most talented Div. 1 football player in the country (disputable, but for the sake of argument I will allow it) but he is not the best team player in the country. He has proven unable to lift his team above top-tier competition by himself on three seperate occasions.

In the same time frame, God-being Dennis Dixon has lost a mere single time, and he lost because the referees flipped a coin and decided to turn a touchdown into a touchback. Tim Tebow, on the other hand, was involved in only 1 game in which he had no control over the final outcome, against LSU. Let's explore the other two games:

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Auburn (20) @ Florida (17)

Tim Tebow's line:
20/27, 201 yds passing, 1 TD, 1 INT
19 rushes, 75 yards, 1 TD
-Tim Tebow posts a clearly subpar line, especially for his standards, at home in the most intimidating stadium in college football, and his team pays the price. This loss falls squarely on Tebow and the offense's shoulders: having to score more than 20 points at home should not have been difficult for a guy who normally posts 300 yard, 4 TD games.

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Georgia (42) vs. Florida (30)
Tim Tebow's line:
14/22, 236 yds passing, 1 TD, no INTs
13 rushes, -15 yards, 2 TDs
-Once again, very conservative numbers for the baby rhinocerous. The -15 yards rushing and 2 TDs may be good if you're a fantasy owner, but not if you're a teammate, or a U of FLA fan.

As I said, the LSU loss is entirely excused because 1) LSU is the number one team in the nation and 2) The Florida defense allowed LSU to convert 3 4th downs on the final drive. In Dennis Dixon's one loss he went 31/44 for 301 yards with 1 TD and 2 INTs, unless you count the final touchdown that should have counted. In the LSU game, Tebow went 12/26 for 158, 2 TDs, and 1 INT, and ran for 67 yards on 16 carries.

If we take out games that their respective teams should have won, Tebow didn't play well in 2 of his team's biggest games, and Dixon has yet to play poorly in a loss. If we count every game regardless of how the game was won, Tim Tebow has lost all three of his team's games while Dennis Dixon has lost only one of his team's.

The Heisman trophy goes to the best player in every aspect of that word. The player must be a talented athlete, must be a fearless leader, must be the most valuable player on his team, and most importantly must win games for his team. Dennis Dixon has proven time and again that he is the best player in the country.

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You don't have to believe me. But you certainly should not believe a man who would suggest that Riddick, aka Vin Diesel is on his side. He is most definitely not. Red is a constant slanderer of everything Vin Diesel, which not only makes him a woman, it makes him UnAmerican. Lying about Vin Diesel's affiliation is bad, but it doesn't end there.

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Riddick is pissed

Jessica Alba hails from California, affiliating her with the Pac-10 conference. Clearly she supports Dennis Dixon. Ronald Reagan was the 33rd governor of California, thus affiliating him with the Pac-10 as well. Bruce Willis is from Germany, and he doesn't give two shits or a fuck about the Heisman. Jesus loves America, and because of that, he must love Dennis Dixon. Allow me to revise the list of people who want Tebow for Heisman:

-Ricky Williams
-Jeb Bush
-millions of illegal immigrants

And Dennis Dixon's list?:
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-although Stacy Kiebler was originally born in Baltimore and was a Ravens cheerleader, she lives in Los Angeles, affiliating her with the Pac-10 and America's candidate, Dennis Dixon.

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-Tarantino was born in Knoxville, Tennessee. While California has no problem supporting a Pac 10 candidate from Oregon, Tennessee has a very large problem with supporting an SEC candidate from Florida. If I have to tell you why, you clearly need to watch more college football.

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Vote for Dennis Dixon, America.

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