Thursday, January 24, 2008

Prayer for Baseball

Chicago Bears- 7-9. Season over.
Chicago Bulls- 17-24. Season perplexing at best.
Bradley Braves- 10-10. Season Mediocre.
Iowa Hawkeyes/Illinois Fighting Illini- 9-11. Miserable.

What does that leave us with? Our only possible salvation, still two months away. The longest and most endurance-demanding of seasons for a fan. Baseball. In this Iggins! and I have chosen our team well, for we have the all-mighty.... Chicago Cubs..........fuck.
But seriously, they went to the playoffs last year and this team looks primed for a real, legitimate run this year. A run that starts March 31st. Assuming I can survive these cold, cruel, football-less months. Sometimes I watch Arena Football on ESPN. Its like shaking up the last beer can to hope that you can get enough of a buzz to last you till you have money to get another case. I need baseball. I need fire in my sports life. Fire provided by this man:


And this man:


And whatever the hell this guy provides:

Karate? A zen-like concentration? An awesome chance for me to buy a Cubs t-shirt that says "Fuk U" on the back? I know Iggins! went into a catatonic seizure the day the Cubs signed Fukudome, but that's really just because he wants to be Japanese so badly the if he weren't afraid of needles he'd have dueling samurais tattooed on his ass. Really I think this is a good signing, but one must always be aware that signing Japanese players gives you an equal chance of getting a Hideki Irabu, a Kaz Matsui, or a Shingo Takatsu instead of a Hideki Matsui, an Ichiro Suzuki or a Tadahito Iguchi. You'll note that I mentioned the suckitude of a Kaz Matsui or a Shingo Takatsu above. You'll also note that the Cubs SIGNED Takatsu and considered giving a big contract to Matsui. That ought to tell you to be wary of their Japanese player evaluating skills. But I'm willing to be optimistic on Fukudome. Mostly because I'm a Cubs fan, and thus gullible enough to be optimistic on most things they sell me. Especially this season.

Which can't come fast enough..