Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Kyle's Next Stop

The Denver Broncos have four quarterbacks on their roster. One is last year's starter, our patron saint, Kyle Orton. One is Brady (Rhymes with Lady) Quinn. One is second year player Tom Brandstater, who Josh McDaniel apparently thinks highly of. The fourth is Tim Tebow. No team really carries four quarterbacks. Oh sure, every team that has four decent options always says in May that they might, but by September one of those guys is on the practice squad or on the street. Common sense would seem to dictate that Brandstater get the axe, but most reports actually have the Broncos considering moving Kyle Orton. Those bastards.

Granted, the original source of these rumors was Woody Page, who is a notorious asshat. However, Michael Lombardi of NFL Network has also stated that he believes the Broncos will move Orton, and I actually like that guy. While that jackass Page says that "Orton is an average quarterback who couldn't start for 21 other teams in the league," I'm going to go ahead and look at all 31 teams in the NFL other than the Broncos and gauge the possibility that they might be interested in Kyle. I'll rank each team's potential need/interest in Kyle from low to high.

Buffalo Bills- Right now they have Trent Edwards, Ryan Fitzpatrick, Brian Brohm, and unheralded rookie Levi Brown. They could definitely use what Kyle Orton brings to the table. Edwards proved last year that he's incapable of handling the pressure of playing behind a subpar offensive line, as he regressed to a 73.8 rating and threw for just 146 ypg in his third year. Fitzpatrick sucks. Brohm has proven to be such a poor fit for the NFL that he couldn't even hack it as the Packers third string quarterback, a mighty fall for a guy who was originally supposed to be the top pick in the 2008 draft. Buffalo, therefore, makes the HIGH category.

Miami Dolphins- Chad Henne is the future there, and they have Chad Pennington coming back in reserve, along with Pat White and former Kansas City quarterback Tyler Thigpen. LOW.

New York Jets- Mark Sanchez is the franchise, Kellen Clemens is a serviceable backup with a strong arm. Third stringer Erik Ainge is entering his third year as the third stinger. LOW.

New England Patriots- The Patriots have their usual group of no names and rookies behind Tom Brady (Brian Hoyer, Jeff Rowe, Zac Robinson), and, as usual, seem uninterested in changing that. Low.

Cleveland Browns- Well, god knows they could USE Kyle Orton, with Jake Delhomme and Seneca Wallace competing for the starting job, but having just acquired those two and having just drafted Colt McCoy, I don't see a trade happening. LOW.

Cincinnati Bengals- Carson Palmer doesn't seem healthy anymore, and JT O'Sullivan hasn't ever impresesd. Jordan Palmer is only there because of his brother. MODERATE, just because Cincy may want some insurance.

Baltimore Ravens- They're set with Joe Flacco, fourth-year man Troy Smith, and John Beck, who's played for Offensive Coordinator Cam Cameron all of his career in both Miami and Baltimore. LOW.

Pittsburgh Steelers- They've already stocked themselves up on quarterbacks to prepare for Roethlisberger's suspension. Charlie Batch, Dennis Dixon, and Byron Leftwich all know their offense and would be ready to start right now. LOW.

Indianapolis Colts- Peyton Manning's never missed a game, and his back up is actually Kyle Orton's successor at Purdue, Curtis Painter. LOW.

Jacksonville Jaguars- They're unhappy with David Garrard and both the owner and the head coach have called him out in the media over the last few months. They reportedly called the Broncos and asked about Brady Quinn and got rebuffed. Luke McCown and an undrafted rookie named Trevor Harris are their only back ups. They could just ask for the other veteran Bronco QB. HIGH.

Houston Texans- They have Matt Schaub, who has a history of getting hurt. His backups are Dan Orlovsky and John David Booty, who both suck. Moderate, just in case they realize how badly they're screwed if Schaub gets hurt again.

Tennessee Titans- Vince Young is determined to prove me wrong, and has thus reclaimed his starting job so that he may once again fail epically. Kerry Collins is, on last report, still alive and sober and is the back up quarterback. They've got Chris Simms and rookie Rusty Smith as well. LOW.

San Diego Chargers- They've got Philip Rivers and Volektricity, and for some unknown reason they drafted Jonathan Crompton. LOW.

Kansas City Chiefs- They gave Matt Cassel (who is actually just Kyle Orton with better PR) a 63 million dollar contract and they still have Brodie Croyle, who I think would actually be a better starter. They've also got former Patriot back-up Matt Gutierrez. LOW.

Oakland Raiders- They just traded for Jason Campbell and still have Charlie Frye, Bruce Gradkowski, and Kyle Boller competing for the #2 and #3 spots. LOW.

Dallas Cowboys- They have Tony Romo, Jon Kitna, and second-year player Stephen McGee. LOW.

Philadelphia Eagles- They're committed to Kevin Kolb and have the league's most famous back-up in Michael Vick. They also just drafted Mike Kafka. LOW.

New York Giants- They have Eli Manning, Jim Sorgi, and Rhett Bomar. LOW.

Washington Redskins- They have the oft-injured Donovan McNabb, and the oft-intercepted Rex Grossman. They may spring for a reliable back-up. MODERATE.

Chicago Bears- Well, Martz wants a veteran back up? I don't think Kyle's a good fit for the offense though. LOW.

Detroit Lions- Stafford is the guy, and they've signed Shaun Hill to back him up. Drew Stanton is still there, too. LOW.

Green Bay Packers- They've got Matt Flynn and Chris Pizzoti behind Aaron Rodgers, who takes a lot of hits. They may want a veteran back up, although this would be heartbreaking indeed. MODERATE.

Minnesota Vikings- I'm sure Favre is coming back, and they already have Tarvaris Jackson and Sage Rosenfels. LOW.

Tampa Bay Buccaneers- Josh Freeman is the guy, and they like Josh Johnson as his back-up, and Jon Gruden is no longer there to collect 9,000 quarterbacks. LOW.

Atlanta Falcons- They're set with Matt Ryan and serviceable veteran Chris Redman. DJ Shockley and John Parker Wilson aren't bad options at third string. LOW.

Carolina Panthers- Matt Moore played pretty well last year, and they just drafted Jimmy Clausen and Tony Pike to amp up the competition. LOW.

New Orleans Saints- All that they've got behind Breesus is Chase Daniel. They could use an insurance plan. Moderate.

Arizona Cardinals- They have to choose between the suck of Matt Leinart and the suck of Derek Anderson, but they won't be in the market for another potential starter. LOW.

San Francisco 49ers- Despite playing well last year, Alex Smith still has a lot to prove. He could falter again, and back-ups David Carr and Nate Davis are unimpressive. It's unlikely that they'd go outside to find help, but it's not impossible. MODERATE.

St. Louis Rams- Honestly, this makes the most possible sense. Sam Bradford isn't ready to start, and it would be a terrible idea for the Rams to run him out there behind that offensive line and let his shoulder get driven into that artificial turf over and over. Playing AJ Feeley, the most-likely veteran starter on the roster, will only guarantee that the temptation to start Bradford will grow with each passing week. Kyle would be a great person to hold down the fort until Bradford is ready, and he could even help Bradford with the transition from playing the spread in college to playing in an NFL offense, as Kyle had to do it as well. High.

Seattle Seahawks- They've already opened up the competition between Matt Hasselbeck and Charlie Whitehurst, who cost them a third round draft pick. It's unlikely they'd go with anyone other than those two guys. LOW.

So there you have it, if the Broncos trade Kyle, the most likely suitors would seem to be the Bills, the Jaguars, and the Rams. The best situation for Kyle would be the Jaguars, as there's talent and at least a slight chance to contend there. The Bills have a terrible offensive line and hired CHAN GAILEY, so there's no hope whatsoever for that entire franchise from now until the end of time. The Rams make the most sense, and Kyle would be extremely valuable as a mentor to Bradford, but they also have little chance to contend. Either way, the future looks murky for our hero.