Tuesday, September 25, 2012

Prognostication Bukakke, NCAA Week 5

#25 Baylor @ #9 West Virginia
Iggins!: WVU is only #9? Geno Smith and the Lords of the Air Raid are not pleased. WVU rolls.

Code Red: Man, this game would have been awesome last year. WVU wins. 
 
Mrs. Code Red: West Virginia.

#14 Ohio State @ #20 Michigan State
Code Red: Both of these teams suck. Ohio State has yet to face a real team, and has still barely won all of it’s games. That said, MSU has looked awful as well. I guess Michigan State at home. How are they still ranked?

Iggins!: This is the part where Michigan State takes all those expectations you have and shits out 7-5. Ohio State wins.

Mrs. Code Red: Michigan State. 
 
#12 Texas @ Oklahoma State
Iggins!: So OK State put up 84 points on Div. 3 Polytechnical State School for the Blind/Deaf/Dumb and people said “Yeah, OK State’s gonna be fine! Then Richrod murdered them, in Stillwater, and now people are like… oh. So yeah, I don’t particularly care for the ‘horns, and I’m pretty sure they’ll lose their next three games in a row, but Texas wins this one.

Code Red: Yeah, that about sums it up. Texas wins. 
 
Mrs. Code Red: Texas. 
 
#18 Oregon State @ Arizona
Code Red: Hmm. I’m going to have to take the home team here, and probably move my record when picking against Oregon State to 0-3. Arizona wins. 
 
Iggins!: You may have realized I have a hard time picking against some teams. Notably Clemson. You may not remember that the other team I have a hard time picking against is Oregon State, and now that they have peeked their head out of the bunker and beaten Wisconsin plus UCLA I can just pick them until I can’t anymore now. Oregon State wins.

Mrs. Code Red: Oregon State. Three in a row!

So after those 4 games the schedule takes a huge dump on everybody’s chest, so these next six aren’t exactly great games. Seriously, it’s so bad Iowa vs. Minnesota is on ESPN2.

Virginia Tech vs. Cincinnati
Iggins!: Uhhh… well, if we go by common opponents, it’s Cincinnati, because they beat Pitt and all. And Tech did not. Also, Tech’s win over GaTech looks quite a bit less impressive after the fighting Triple-Options got dropped by Da U. And I whiffed by not picking Rutgers last week despite a mighty desire to do so. By the way this game is being played in Landover, MD. Odd. I’ll take Cincinnati to win.

Code Red: Wait, what? I’ll take Virginia Tech, because they already lost their shitty early season game so now they’ll roll to their Orange Bowl beatdown. 

Iggins!: That is, of course, the other possibility, since VaTech always does this. To clarify, I picked Arkansas because SEC > Big East, thus I do not want to pick against the Big East just cuz this week.

Mrs. Code Red: Cincinnati. 
 
N.C. State @ Miami (FL)
Code Red: Man, these games do suck. NC State.
 
Iggins!: It just gets worse. Sigh. Why the fuck not? Miami wins.

Mrs. Code Red: G-Reg! Miami.

#8 Stanford @ Washington
Iggins!: Stanford is ranked ahead of WVU. They always beat USC! We can’t reward them this much for that! Still, until Sark actually proves he’s going to start putting 8 and 9 win teams out there, I’ve got Stanford to win.

Code Red: I do not intend to keep agreeing with you in such a fashion. Stanford wins. 
 
Mrs. Code Red: Washington.

Arizona State @ California
Code Red: Hmm. AZ State has looked very good, when they look good. Does that make sense? Cal doesn’t look good, ever. AZ State wins. 
 
Iggins!: I hate Todd Graham so goddamned much. So this pains me. ASU wins.

Mrs. Code Red: Arizona State. 
 
Wisconsin @ #22 Nebraska
Iggins!: They need to unrank all the B1G teams. Nebraska wins?

Code Red: I have to keep riding Nebraska as my one hope for a somewhat mildly respectable B1G team. Damn you, UCLA! Nebraska wins. 
 
Mrs. Code Red: Nebraska. Wisconsin just sucks.

Arkansas @ Texas A&M (see how I avoided Iowa-Minnesota there? EH?!)
Code Red: You took the coward’s road. I can’t see any way Arkansas avoids just completely unraveling at this point. By the way, did you see John L. Smith owes $25 million or something in debt? How the hell…? Texas A&M wins. 
 
Iggins!: He says real estate ventures. He also says they were profitable at one point. He is also completely and utterly fucking insane. Texas A&M wins.

Mrs. Code Red: Texas A&M.

Prognostication Bukakke, NFL Week 4

Standings:

NCAA
Code Red: 19-11
Mrs. Code Red: 17-13
Iggins!: 17-13

NFL:
Code Red: 25-23
Mrs. Code Red: 23-25
Iggins!: 19-29

Overall:
Code Red: 43-35
Mrs. Code Red: 40-38
Iggins!: 36-42

Browns @ Ravens
Code Red: Aww. Thanks to Rog’s stupid rule that lead to an unnecessary Thursday Night game for everyone, we get Brandon Weeden’s decapitation on national TV. Ravens win.

Iggins!: Holy shit, 19-29?! WOW. I’ll take the Ravens to win, obviously.

Code Red: Yeah, things are not going your way. It’s awesome.

Mrs. Code Red: Ravens.

Panthers @ Falcons
Iggins!: The Panthers are pretty easy to figure out at this point. They’ll trash the teams worse than them and get trashed by those better. Falcons win.

Code Red: This is the year! That the Falcons win a playoff game. Definitely maybe. Falcons win.

Mrs. Code Red: Falcons.

Vikings @ Lions
Code Red: The Vikings could totally win this game. Stafford may not play, and the Lions defense is horrid. That said, I’m going with the outcome that guarantees at least a share of first place for the Bears anyway. Lions win.

Iggins!: That Vikings win last week was interesting, and the Lions looked like garbage with Stafford in, so I’ll try to get some wins back and take the Vikings to win.

Mrs. Code Red: Lions.

Chargers @ Chiefs
Iggins!: I’m going to be at this game for my anniversary so the Chiefs better fucking win.

Code Red: So, so touching. Chargers win.

Mrs. Code Red: Chargers.

Titans @ Texans
Code Red: The Texans are just frighteningly good. I don’t see Jake Locker being able to win this game singlehandedly, since you know their run game will do nothing against that Texans front seven. Texans win.

Iggins!: Yeah, but Locker looks pretty solid. He’s going to get beaten up here, but he shouldn’t take this ass-kicking to heart. He has a future. Texans win.

Code Red: I said nothing negative about Jake Locker. You know he’s an ARMCOCK I’ve long admired.

Mrs. Code Red: Texans.

Patriots @ Bills
Iggins!: Do the Bills have the same schedule they had last year? Jesus. This is where the Bills upset the Pats if we follow the storyline, right? Haha, well, I don’t think the Pats are losing 3 in a row, I don’t care if they’re playing 11 Godzillas. Patriots win.

Code Red: And 6-10 looks entirely possible again! Patriots win.

Mrs. Code Red: Patriots.

49ers @ Jets
Code Red: These two teams are mirror images of each other, only the Jets are worse at everything than the 49ers. 49ers win.

Iggins!: Yeah, that about sums it up. The Jets are what the 49ers would be if the 49ers sucked. 49ers win.

Mrs. Code Reds: 49ers.

Seahawks @ Rams
Iggins!: The Ram pass defense has been surprisingly stout, but I have refursed to pick St. Louis to beat Seattle since they screwed me two years in a row: Seahawks win.

Code Red: Going to be real interesting to see which of the Good Defense/Mediocre Offense pairing in the NFC West will float to the top. Seahawks win.
Mrs. Code Red: Seahawks.

Bengals @ Jaguars
Code Red: I feel the Bengals collapse coming at some point. They’ll be a very deceiving 3-1 after this. But, shit, Gabbert can’t hit a lucky 80 yard pass with two second left every week, can he? Bengals win.

Iggins!: Poor Andrew Luck. That was one of the few winnable Colts games this year. This is a great game for an upset, butI’ll keep it safe and take the Bengals to win.

Mrs. Code Red: Bengals.

Raiders @ Broncos
Iggins!: Have to go with Peyton here now that the Broncos are out of a brutal 3 game stretch to open the season. Broncos win.

Code Red: Indeed you do. Broncos win.

Mrs. Code Red: Broncos.

Dolphins @ Cardinals
Code Red: The Cardinals, 49ers, and Seahawks all have top tier defenses. All of them have middling-to-bad offenses. It’ll be interesting to see who rises to the top. Cardinals should have no issues here, though.

Iggins!: If Reggie Bush plays, this ought to be close, but I’m done picking against Arizona until they actually manage to lose. Cardinals win.

Mrs. Code Red: Cardinals.

Saints @ Packers
Iggins!: I would not want to be the Saints right now. The Packers are 1-2 and just got screwed more epically than any team has ever been screwed. Saints at 0-4? Saints at 0-4. Packers win.

Code Red: This is going to get ugly. The Saints defense has been historically bad the first three games, and here’s a Green Bay team that’s been bottled up for four straight games going back to the playoffs, and is now extremely pissed off. Packers win big.

Mrs. Code Red: Packers

Redskins @ Tampa Bay
Code Red: Tampa Bay’s defense is very good when they have Gerald McCoy, but that offense is shit. Josh Freeman looks nothing like the guy he seemed to be in 2010. RGIII should outscore them. Redskins win.

Iggins!: Vincent Jackson is trying so goddamned hard to make Freeman look good. The Bucs can’t stop RG3 enough to keep up with Washington. Redskins win.

Mrs. Code Red: Redskins.

Giants @ Eagles
Iggins!: The Eagles are bad. Very bad. Beating the Ravens was more because the Ravens just do that randomly sometimes. Giants win.

Code Red: The Eagles aren’t bad. Their defensive line is stout, their secondary is good, they can run the ball. They’re just crippled by the human turnover machine. Giants win.

Mrs. Code Red: Eagles.

Bears @Cowboys
Code Red: These two teams are also very similar. So much talent on both sides of the ball, and yet it’s hard to really declare either of them contenders until they put together a few complete games in a row. If the Bears are smart, and if Cutler finally steps up and plays like he’s capable of playing, they should win this. They certainly need to keep on the pedal while Green Bay is down. Bears win, 24-17.

Iggins!: The Cowboys coin-flip was heads last week. That means this week it’s tails. Bears win, 20-9.

Mrs. Code Red: Bears 24-10.