Thursday, November 11, 2010

Prognostication Bukakke: NFL Week 10

Baltimore @ Atlanta
Code Red: Hmm. Overrated Ravens team vs. Overrated Falcons team. I'll take the overrateds at home. Falcons win.

Iggins!: Ravens are overrated. Falcons much less so. Falcons win.

Cincinnati @ Indianapolis
Iggins!: One of the Bengals receivers wants more catches?! NO! I am shocked. Colts win.

Code Red: I actually commend Ocho for not pointing out that Carson Palmer is the reason why he has gone into decline. Colts win.

Carolina @ Tampa Bay
Code Red: Tampa.

Iggins!: I see we have reached a consensus on the team we don’t need to waste words on this year. Bucs win.

Code Red: Truly, Carolina doth blow.

Detroit @ Buffalo
Iggins!: Stafford went down and took my damned upset pick with him. I feel bad for the Lions, but without Stafford they are resigned to losing close games. Bills win.

Code Red: Indeed. Pity Matt Stafford. Buffalo finally breaks through. That said, the Lions are way better than their record and they'll end up getting a top ten pick out of this season and will terrorize the league if they can get a healthy Stafford next year.

Houston @ Jacksonville
Code Red: Jacksonville is really good at beating bad teams and then getting pasted by good ones. I'm not sure anymore where the Texans sit, but I'll give them one last shot this week. Texans win.

Iggins!: So the Texans have a great offense. Seriously, it’s spectacular. But that defense… jesus. And the play calling makes the least of what they’ve got. I’ll take the Texans because I love em but my faith meter is running low. Texans win.

Tennessee @ Miami
Iggins!: Like putting Pennington will improve things? This one won’t be close. Titans win.

Code Red: Wait, what? The Dolphins went back to Pennington? Jesus. At this point my grandmother can throw a better deep ball. Titans win.

Minnesota @ Chicago
Code Red: Please, Jesus, let the Bears destroy Favre and put the Vikings out of their misery. If the Bears' run defense can play as well as it has most of this year and contain Peterson, I think we'll see plenty of turnovers by Favre, who has traditionally struggled against Lovie's defenses. Bears win.

Iggins!: Because I’m not a dick I won’t pick against the Bears, but I would remind you that AP DESTROYS the Bears more than any other team he plays. That said, the Bears will enjoy the takeaways and beating Brad Childress into getting fired. Bears win.

NY Jets @ Cleveland
Iggins!: So the Jets have looked like junk and the Browns have looked great. I want to pick the Browns but I don’t think Mangini’s BS works on Rex. Jets win.

Code Red: At some point the Jets have to snap out of their funk. Might as well be against Cleveland. Jets win.

Kansas City @ Denver
Code Red: Josh McDaniels is where he is for a number of reasons, but one of those reasons is that he was racist and refused to believe that Peyton Hillis could be good as a white runningback. This is America, Josh. We have no room for your bigotry. Chiefs win.

Iggins!: Peyton Hillis is breaking boundaries. Maybe one day white RBs can be thought of as equals, but until that day we will fight against the racism. Cleveland (recently), KC, and Oakland are all winning with A+ offensive lines, great RBs, and good defense. What is this, the fucking 60s? Chiefs win

Code Red: Oakland has looked good, yes, but on no planet can that offensive line be described as "Great".

Seattle @ Arizona
Iggins!: Wow. Talk about meaningless. Arizona?

Code Red: Sadly not meaningless, as the NFC West is up for grabs. My gut says Arizona as well. They'll probably give me the ol' Jake Plummer and screw me, though.

Dallas @ NY Giants
Code Red: Oh man. Tell me they aren't going to televise this. Giants win.

Iggins!: Ever seen a man get penetrated by like 6 horses at once? No? Well the closest thing you’ll ever see to it is probably this game. Giants win.

St. Louis @ San Francisco
Iggins!: St. Louis will make the playoffs at 7-9 or 8-8 while the Bears miss the playoffs at 9-7 or 10-6. Goddamn this world. Rams win.

Code Red: Sadly St. Louis is indeed the favorite at this point. Rams win.

New England @ Pittsburgh
Code Red: Oh hell. Logic tells me to go with the Steelers, but I have a feeling that the Patriots can't be as bad as they looked against the Browns. This is exactly the kind of game Belichick would win just to piss me off. Patriots win.

Iggins!: The Patriots struggle against teams with hard running games. The Steelers will hopefully remember how awesome Rashard is this week and run him 30 times. Steelers win.

Philadelphia @ Washington
Iggins!: My vote for best team in the league goes to Philly this week. Even if Vick gets hurt my vote stays the same. Eagles win.

Code Red: I wanted to give you more than one game to try to make up this week, but jesus these matchups are mostly pathetic. Eagles win.