Wednesday, August 1, 2012

For the Record: Inappropriate death jokes and Joe Flacco factory edition

In a new feature called “For the Record” which attempts to capture the madness of our everyday conversations (and also alleviate work-related boredom) Code Red and Iggins! will discuss recent relevant (and completely irrelevant) sports topics. These conversations are uncensored and reading them may result in a loss of sanity, or even a complete and total descent into madness. You have been warned.




Iggins!







So, on a scale ranging from Gaines Adams to Julius Peppers, how good do you think this Price fella will be?

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Hard to say. Injuries have kept him from being as effective as he can be. He was a 2nd round pick for a reason. Considering the Bears don’t really Need him, but seem to think he’s got major potential, I’d say he’ll probably be somewhere near where Amobi Okoye was last year. A solid rotation guy who is somewhere in between a true 3 technique (like Melton) and a true nose (like Toeiana). Good depth if healthy.

Iggins!







That's a good transition to my opinion on the guy, which is this: if the Bears wanted Amobi Okoye so bad why didn't they keep Amobi Okoye?!

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Because Amobi Okoye played well enough as a role player to convince the Bucs that he could be more than that, and they paid him accordingly. The Bears knew they could probably replace Okoye’s production for less money. Considering I expect Melton and especially Paea to be better this year, this was a smart move. The key is McClellin. I’m not going to be a meatball reactionary who overreacts to the people who gave him mixed reviews on his FIRST DAY OF FUCKING PRACTICE (google it or search on twitter, then facepalm), but he’s got to be a pure speed rushing presence on 3rd down. Izzy’s a workhorse but his pass rushing went into the tank the last half of the season last year. As I said, I could also see the Bears rotating Izzy inside to make room for McClellin on plays where teams try to spread them out. You know that NASCAR package the Giants have where they line up JPP, Tuck, Umenyiora, and Kiwanuka? The Bears could try something similar with Peppers, Wootton, Izzy, and McClelin, or even just Peppers, Melton, Izzy, and Shea since Melton was a DE before last year and is a pure pass rusher. I’d really like to see Wootton take a step up. It’d take a lot of pressure off of McClellin if Wootton develops, and it would also allow them to get Peppers off the field sometimes, which they’ve rarely been able to do the last two years.

Iggins!







How much did Okoye make? I think this "rent a former bust D-Linemen for one good year" strategy works out well in a lot of ways. If he turns out to be amazing, sign him up! If not he outplays his actual ability, let someone else overpay him! If he sucks? Cut him for no cap penalty!

College Previewkakke: B1G Leaders Division Preview


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Finally we have arrived at the B1G (isn’t that easier to digest than “Big 10+2-Penn State and Ohio State kind of”?), and, by default, we have to start in the division with two teams who will not matter at all to anybody ever this season (or, in PSU’s case, for many years into the future).

So what the hell happened to the B1G? Where did the league known for infinitely replaceable, immobile, white quarterbacks go? Didn’t this league used to be the last bastion of pro-style game plans in the entire NCAA? Suddenly 7 of the 12 teams run some form of spread, 2 of the 12 just run (and neither of those two were even here 30 years ago… who was supposed to guard the door?!), and we’re left with only three teams still running some semblance of NFL game plan. Leaving Iowa and MSU for the Legends division, that leads us nicely to Wisconsin, the current dominant B1G team.

It’s still strange to say something like that in a conference featuring Michigan and Ohio State, and I didn’t even grow up during a time in which Michigan was great. Somehow Wisconsin has managed to pull together several great seasons in a row on the strength of… well, the same exact thing Wisconsin always did well with; great offensive lines, better running backs (and at least one offensive lineman PLAYING running back at all times), solid defense, and the same quarterback you could swear has been there since you were born (The Russell Wilson aberration notwithstanding. Lord knows the only reason he transferred to Wiscy is because he didn’t want to change jersey colors).

Their competition in the Leaders has been… removed? Yes, that’s a nice way to put it. Ohio State is still serving time for selling things they earned for other things they wanted (yeah, the bigger deal was that Tressel lied about it, but seriously: if I fucking win something I should be able to sell it all I want), and Penn State is… well, they’re going to be busy with lawsuits and things (AVOIDING OBVIOUS SUBJECT MATTER). So the remaining competition is… oh jesus. Illinois, Purdue, and Indiana? I won’t even have to try with this one. What follows are 100% accurate predictions for the Leaders this season! Wow, they need to change that division name: