Support my attention-whoring ways by following us on twitter!

Get the SKOdcast imported directly into your brain!

Sunday, November 23, 2008

Kyle Orton Receives First Annual "Not Rex Grossman" Award

Lest it be lost in the excitement over the Bears 27-3 drubbing of the hapless St. Louis Rams today, we at Start Kyle Orton would like to point out the fact that Kyle Orton has now set the Chicago Bears franchise record with 185 straight passes attempted without an interception. While Orton passed for just 139 yards, mostly in the first half as the Bears mostly attempted to control clock in the second, the Bears offense ran the ball efficiently and played smart football. Orton has now been awarded the coveted "Not Rex Grossman" Award, a prestigious accomplishment based on the following criteria:

1. Solid play from the quarterback position.
2. Effective at directing an offense and scoring points (Bears averaging 24.3 ppg).
3. No mind-numbingly stupid turnovers or "aww fuck it" interceptions.
4. Not Rex Grossman.

Upon receiving the award, Kyle had the following to say:

"Well, you know, I guess I just have a good head on my shoulders. I spend a lot of time watching game film and really honing my game in practice during the week. I try to keep my head about me during the game, keep awareness of the pocket and pressure and I guess I just make it a point not to make the big mistake that'll hurt the team. Sometimes you just gotta say "hey, he's not open, we'll punt it and get 'em the next go round." This award just really vindicates my approach toward the game and my goal each game of running the offense effectively and not pissing all over myself in a panicked, turnover producing manner."

Bears back-up quarterback Rex Grossman was also asked for comment:

"You know, I'd have to say there are sometime's that I too, wish I could not be Rex Grossman."

Grossman then sighed heavily as he grabbed his clipboard and left the locker room.

(also, if anyone saw the block K.O. threw to free Devin Hester on that reverse to start the game...Awesome)

No comments: