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Wednesday, October 17, 2012

Prognostication Bukakke, NFL Week 7

Mrs. Code Red: 39-21
Code Red: 37-23
Iggins!: 35-25

Code Red: 53-37
Mrs. Code Red: 51-39
Iggins!: 48-42

Code Red: 90-60
Mrs. Code Red: 90-60
Iggins!: 83-67

Seahawks @ 49ers
Code Red: Seahawks are a totally different team on the road, 49ers won't lose two in a row at home. 49ers win.

Iggins!: Agreed. 49ers win.

Mrs. Code Red: 49ers win.

Saints @ Buccaneers
Iggins!: The Chiefs make everybody (except Baltimore) look good, and I think Breesus is going to will this team to 8-8. Saints win.

Code Red: The Buccaneers are shitty. Saints win.

Mrs. Code Red: Saints.

Cowboys @ Panthers
Code Red: Hmm. Both equally disappointing teams. Well, the Cowboys are disappointing to fans and pundits, anyway. I find their yearly failures enjoyable. Still, I'm flipping the coin and thinking they're more likely to win this one than Carolina. Cowboys win.

Iggins!: Until Cam shows that he's out of this slump, I'll take the Cowboys to win.

Mrs. Code Red: Cowboys win.

Cardinals @ Vikings
Iggins!: The Cardinals are so bad, and the Vikings are good enough to take care of bad teams. Vikings win.

Code Red: Jared Allen seems to be warming up just in time for the world’s worst offensive line to make an appearance in the dome. Vikings win.

Mrs Code Red: Vikings win.

Titans @ Bills
Code Red: Oh, lord. The Bills are terrible and are going to have a winning record, aren't they? Bills win.

Iggins!: I don't want to take the Bills. You can't make me take the Bills! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-Bills win.

Mrs. Code Red: Bills win.

Redskins @ Giants
Iggins!: The Giants showed the 49ers weakness last week more than they showed their strength, but Eli should be able to slice and dice the Redskin secondary. Giants win.

Code Red: The Giants are capable of beating anybody, but the inverse is often true as well. Still, the Redskins defense allowed 352 yards to Pennington the Younger. Giants win.

Mrs. Code Red: Giants win.

Browns @ Colts
Code Red: For all of the splooging over Andrew Luck (and I don't mean to discredit him, since he's played very well in spots and certainly seems likely to be the guy we all thought he'd be), Brandon Weeden's posted very good numbers (for a rookie at least) since his opening day debacle against Nnamdi Asomugah, and his team has more talent than their 1-5 record. Browns win.

Iggins!: The Colts at home are very different than the Colts on the road. Richardson may be out. I'll take the Colts to win.

Mrs. Code Red: Colts win.

Ravens @ Texans
Iggins!: The Texans made some schematic mistakes last week which I hope they fail to do this week. Stopping the Ravens shouldn't be very difficult for Houston if Baltimore forgets they have Ray Rice. And they always forget they have Ray Rice. So Houston wins.

Code Red: Even if the Ravens remember Ray Rice is there, the Texans have Arian Foster, and now that the Ravens defense is absolutely devastated there’s no way Joe Flacco could pull an Aaron Rodgers and beat the Texans. Texans win.

Mrs. Code Red: Texans win.

Packers @ Rams
Code Red: The Rams will pressure Rodgers and ensure that there'll be another week of “What's wrong with Green Bay's offense!?!” even after Rodger's pummeling of Houston, but I can't see the Rams scoring enough to win. Packers win.

Iggins!: The points are the issue. I can see the Rams holding Green Bay to 20 but only being able to score 13. Packers win.

Mrs. Code Red: Packers.

Jaguars @ Raiders
Iggins!: The Raiders seem to play to the level of their competition. Home team here. Raiders win.

Code Red: Carson Palmer vs. Blaine Gabbert. A guy who once was, but isn’t, versus a guy who never has been and never will be. Raiders win.

Mrs. Code Red: Jaguars win.

Jets @ Patriots
Code Red: The Jets won with Mirerez throwing for 82 yards. Not a bad formula, really, but they're not going to beat New England. Patriots win.

Iggins!: Yeah Shonn Greene can probably only do that against the Colts. Patriots win.

Mrs. Code Red: Patriots win.

Steelers @ Bengals
Iggins!: The Steelers are in need of some rebuilding. They're getting old at several key spots, are beset by injuries... etc. Even though they're so damn mediocre, I'll take Cincinnati to win.

Code Red: I foresee a shootout, but a Steelers victory. Steelers win.

Mrs. Code Red: Steelers win.

Lions @ Bears
Code Red: There aren't many teams you can really feel Lovie Smith's hatred for. He's usually so tight-lipped and respectful toward everyone, but his enmity for the Lions and everything about their big-talking, cheap-shotting, undisciplined style of play is obvious. Last year the Lions hit two big plays thanks to Brandon Meriweather and Chris Harris to win in Detroit. Once the Bears worked Conte and Wright into the lineup and righted the ship on defense they shut Detroit up quick with a 37-13 demolition that wrapped up all of the Lions shortcomings with a neat little bow. This year will be no different. They can't run the ball against the Bears front seven, meaning they'll force Stafford to drop back and throw 40+ passes against the Bears defensive line that, mind you, is much better and deeper than the overrated Ndamukong Suh and Co. Their secondary can't cover worth a damn and Jay Cutler has a 10-1 ratio and a glistening 105 passer rating against the Lions in his career. The Bears are 5-1 in the last six years coming out of the bye, and they're 8-2 in Lovie's career on Monday Night Football. I don't mean to rant, but they will destroy these shitheads. Bears 34, Lions 17.

Iggins!: You don't mean to rant? You ALWAYS mean to rant. Bears win 248 to -3. (See how I showed my disgust for Detroit there so quickly?)

Mrs. Code Red: Bears 34, Lions 10.

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