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Wednesday, September 14, 2011

The Return of Prognostication Bukakke! (Again). NCAA Week 2

It's back, folks. The weekly feature where I and the reclusive co-founder of SKO, Iggins!, match wits and predict the winner of this week's football games. As usual, we pick the ten best college football games and then predict every NFL game. This year I've also decided to have Mrs. SKO join us for the whole year, as she joined for the last several weeks last year as part of an exercise in which I, already up 25 games on Iggins!, decided to demonstrate that even someone with absolutely minimal football acumen could destroy him. Which she did. I laughed hard, so now I'm bringing her on full time. Without further bullshit, here come the picks:

LSU @ Mississippi State (1-1)

Code Red: Mississippi State really shocked me with their incredibly shoddy defense against Auburn. I'd expect them to right the ship against the Tigers defensively, but LSU's defense is a holy terror. LSU wins.

Iggins!: It's near impossible to pick MSU in this game, which is unfortunate considering how high the expectations were just a week ago. LSU wins.

Mrs. Code Red: Geaux Tigers! LSU wins.

Tennessee (2-0) @ Florida (2-0)

Iggins!: This game is going to be extremely close, but I'll give the edge to Florida here. Florida wins.

Code Red: I don't know that it'll be that close. I think Charlie Weis will really make something out of Jonathan Brantley. Florida wins.

Mrs. Code Red: Florida, because Volunteers is a stupid name and bright orange uniforms are nauseating.

Michigan State (2-0) @ Notre Dame (0-2)

Code Red: Notre Dame has really been a tough luck loser so far, but that doesn't change the fact that they're staring at 0-3. MSU wins.

Iggins!: Damn, I was really hoping you'd take Notre Dame here. Michigan State wins by at least 10 points.

Mrs. Code Red: I actually watched Notre Dame last week. I don't think they can stop anything. MSU wins.

Oklahoma (1-0) @ Florida State (2-0)

Iggins!: I'll trust the ACC when I see it do... anything? Oklahoma wins.

Code Red: God dammit, too much agreement this week. Oklahoma wins.

Mrs. Code Red: I'll take Florida State because it's fun to be controversial.

Arizona State (2-0) @ Illinois (2-0)

Code Red: Illinois has looked quite dominant against two shitty teams. Their schedule is really stacked in their favor, as their only tough non-conference opponent has to travel all the way to Champaign. I'm definitely taking my beloved Illini here.

Iggins!: If this were in the desert I would take ASU by a TD, but without that ridiculous home-field advantage versus the midwest, this game plays out in reverse. Illini win by 20.

Mrs. Code Red: Illinois, because....home state loyalty?

Utah (1-1) @ BYU (1-1)

Iggins!: Wow. So this is a game between a Pac-12 school and an independent... not a Mountain West conference game? Neither of these teams is very good, but I'll take BYU to win by a hair.

Code Red: Well, BYU played Texas tough last week, but I want to believe that that's just because Texas sucks. Utah.

Mrs. Code Red: BYU, but they're both losers because I don't like the state of Utah.

Code Red: Seems like an odd state to hate, but if there's anything I approve of, it's unexplained rage.

Stanford (2-0) @ Arizona (1-1)

Code Red: After watching OK State demolish the Wildcats I can't imagine Andrew Luck not doing the same. Stanford wins.

Iggins!: Though I don't think Stanford has a more potent offense than OK State I do think this game will be a win for Stanford.

Mrs. Code Red: Stanford, because Andrew Luck is pretty dreamy.

Code Red: Yes, yes he is.

Syracuse (2-0) @ USC (2-0)

Iggins!: Who the hell scheduled this nightmare? Aren't these two schools about as far apart as possible? USC wins partially due to Syracuse being Syracuse and partially due to massive jetlag.

Code Red: I say Syracuse, because USC's been flirting with disaster and Syracuse is better than people think.

Mrs. Code Red: USC, because they're cheater, cheater, pumpkin eaters. And this is America, so cheaters win.

Code Red: She went third grade on yo ass, Lane Kiffin.

Ohio State (2-0) @ Miami (FL) (0-1)

Code Red: Apparently Miami is plotting to vacate their possible win here later on by starting Jacory Harris. I'm going to with Miami, here, since fucking Toledo's scrambling Qbs gave OSU fits last week.

Iggins!: Jesus you took all my upsets! Miami wins because God hates OSU even more, surprisingly.

Mrs. Code Red: I'll take The Ohio State University, because everyone knows it apparently makes you better than everyone else if you put a "The" in front of your name.

Louisville (1-1) @ Kentucky (2-0)

Iggins!: Kentucky wins. Anybody who watches this game loses.

Code Red: Well, you made this easy on me then. Louisville wins. My eyes can never unsee the ugliness of Kentucky vs. Western Kentucky. They show that game on loop in football hell.

Mrs. Code Red: Do I have to pick one? I know nothing about these teams. I'll take Kentucky since they have the better record? And because I like disagreeing with you.

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